Tag Archives: Jaw with John

Dear John: Coworkers Don’t Pull Weight In Potluck

This may seem minor in the scheme of things, but it’s driving me crazy. Occasionally we have a potluck day at work. The problem is, while there are always people who eat, others never bring food to share. It’s usually the men in our office — those who hold higher positions and make far more money than the rest of us. They are also the ones who eat the most. They go back for seconds before the rest of us have eaten. If they do occasionally bring anything, it’s usually a bag of chips.

I’m tired of paying for their lunches when they are more than capable of providing something — takeout from a deli or even asking their wives to help. I’m also tired of going to get my lunch and discovering most of the food is already gone. I would welcome your advice or any tips your readers may have.

— FED UP IN DES MOINES

Dear Fed Up,

This isn’t minor. This is a crime against food.

This reminds me of when I participated in a Secret Santa while I was in college. Nearly everyone involved put some thought into their gifts. Even when one was a joke gift, the effort put into the presentation and the actual gift itself was worthy of the gift exchange. But there was one person who clearly went to the campus mini mart that day and bought a giant package of orange Tic Tacs. They’re the best Tic Tac, obviously, but it was that there was so little thought (or that they just forgot about it altogether) that really irked me and others.

What I am getting at is that there needs to be more organization and accountability.

I would start with some sort of itemized list of what one will bring to the potluck. We do this every year for my Friendsgiving. I am tasked with bringing a salad, someone else brings dessert, etc. If you don’t want to deal with assigning specific food I recommend that you print out a sign-up sheet and have slots for dessert, appetizers, meat entree, salad, etc. Do this coupled with stating that in order to actually partake in the potluck, you will need to bring an item on that list. Do that and institute a “no seconds” rule until everyone has gone through the line once.

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Dear John: Pervy Guy Needs To Be In A Permanent Child’s Pose

What’s the deal with adolescent girls and young women wearing extremely tight and form-fitting yoga/workout pants? Last week, while I was leaving a smoothie shop, I held the door open for a young lady whose pants were so tight I could easily see the outline of her private area.

Yesterday, while I was waiting for my drink at a coffee place, a girl in her early teens walked in wearing similar attire. She was with her dad. In this situation I blame him. No father should allow his daughter to wear an outfit in public that leaves nothing to the imagination. These kinds of pants are designed for the gym, and that should be it. Your opinion?

— CONSERVATIVE GUY IN FLORIDA

Dear Guy,

Perhaps these young ladies have just come from a workout or yoga class. Did you ever think of that?

You also sound a little pervy, Guy in Florida.

Adjust your gaze if their choice of outerwear offends you because they are wearing something that makes them comfortable and they are comfortable wearing it in public. They are not going to change just because you don’t like what they are wearing; nor should they.

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Dear John: Brother Needs To Take A Pregnant Pause Before Delivering News

Would it be rude to announce my wife’s pregnancy before her sister’s wedding next week? Do I need to wait until afterward, or is good news always welcome?

— GOOD NEWS IN THE MIDWEST

Dear Good News,

Yes, it would be rude. Don’t do it.

Before my sister got married I found out that I was accepted into an internship in South Africa, leaving a a week after her wedding. I didn’t tell her, or anyone besides my mom, until after the wedding because I didn’t want people to find out and focus their attention on me and what I was going to be doing.

I also didn’t tell anyone else in my family until I sent them an email when I boarded the plane to Johannesburg. It was fun to check my email 13+ hours later and see dozens of replies and forwards with some variation of “What!?!?”

You can wait until after your sister’s wedding to tell your friends and family that your wife is pregnant.

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Dear John: Mom Needs To Take A Big Rip From The Grav And Chill

I have a dilemma. My daughter, who is 22, confided in me that one of her best friends from high school smokes pot.

My daughter does not hang out with her because they attend different colleges.

I was very close to this girl when she was growing up. She was at my house all the time. Her mom and I are still very good friends.

My daughter says to stay out of it and to not tell her mom.

I was very disappointed to hear this about my daughter’s friend. I’m not sure what I should do. What do you think? Should I tell the mother what the daughter is doing?

— Worried

Dear Worried,

It. Is. None. Of. Your. Business.

This young woman is an adult. An adult who is not your daughter. It is that simple.

Furthermore, you fail to mention what state you live in. Are you aware that marijuana use is becoming more acceptable and is legal in some states? Because it is.

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Dear John: Parents Want ETA, Son Is MIA And For Good Reason

My 47-year-old son is employed at a prestigious university. His position involves a considerable amount of travel.

Over the years, he always emailed us his travel plans along with flight information. Lately, he tells us when and where he is going but omits the flight, hotel information, etc. When we ask, our requests are ignored. When we tell him we think it’s irresponsible for him not to share this information, his response is, “My secretary has the information if there are any problems.”

We always give our children our travel information, flights, hotels, etc. when we travel. Our question is, are we out of line for wanting this information from him? — LOVING PARENTS IN NEW HAMPSHIRE

Dear Loving Parents,

Your ADULT son is just that; an adult. I would understand if it were flight info and hotel info for when he was traveling to or from your home but not just for random trips. He probably wants some privacy and doesn’t want and, frankly, he doesn’t need to share any of his trip information with you. You are out of line for wanting this info from him when he has told you that he won’t be providing that information to you.

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