Tag Archives: Girlfriend Advice

“Jaw With John” – Polly Wants A Sugar Daddy

My friend, “Dave,” has been dating his girlfriend “Polly” for more than a year. When I was visiting, I asked her why there was half-eaten food everywhere, and she said, “Oh, I’ll just leave that for Dave to clean up.” At this point Dave was working 35 hours a week, plus college, while she, fresh out of high school, had no job or obligations of any kind.

When I talked to Dave about this, he said that things would change when they officially moved in together. Guess what — nothing has changed. She works part time and Dave is working nonstop. I told him he needs a helpful partner, and now is the time for Polly to start growing up.

He said he’s afraid to have that conversation with her because he doesn’t want her to get mad. I’ve wondered if I should speak directly to her.

I think she’s suffering from Princess Syndrome. He’s killing himself trying to provide for her and she, seemingly, will not lift a finger.

I’m worried for my friend. He used to be so adventurous, but now he’s just overwhelmed and tired. I’ve tried to talk to him, but the boy is too love-struck to see sense. Is there anything I can do for him at this point? — Worried Pal”

Dear Worried,

Eww.

Leaving half-eaten food out for hours at a time waiting for it to be picked up by someone else when it could easily be picked up by the person who left the food is gross. Gross gross gross.

She’s “fresh out of high school” and that might be a key factor here. Maybe she’s not used to having to be responsible for her own actions. Now that she’s with Dave, Polly thinks that he will be her new cleaner/maid/Sugar Daddy. A true Princess.

The bad news – or maybe it’s good news – is that your friend is aware of the situation. At some point it may get too much for him to deal with and that feeling of being “love sick” might be cured and he’ll tell her how he really feels about the food situation.

You’ve done what you can and should not confront her. So, you continue to do you and be his friend because he’ll need you.

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“Jaw With John” – Girlfriend’s Strength Has Got Him Pinned

I’m an average guy, fitness-wise. My girlfriend, always naturally sporty, has been at the gym for a year. Our fitness paths collided when I was enjoying a coffee with her and her training partner at home.

On prompting by her trainer, my girlfriend flexed and her bicep popped up so high my eyes bulged. Her partner then prodded me to flex. I didn’t want to, as I knew my muscle wasn’t as developed. The partner felt both our flexed arms and declared mine softer. She then pushed us to arm wrestle.

I am 3 inches taller than she and I am a man, so I thought I should win. Anyway, after two times on the right and once on the left, I ended up with the back of my hand securely pinned down to the table — to their extreme delight. I feel extremely embarrassed.

This has changed the dynamics in our relationship. She will now teasingly flex when she wants something. And she enjoys challenging me in public. I have now been defeated in arm wrestling in front of her parents and a group of her girlfriends. It’s hard to adjust.

— Outmuscled

Dear Outmuscled,

There’s a part of me that wants to tell you “Get over it and laugh it off” because physical strength isn’t everything. But you seem to believe that you have been stripped of your masculinity because of this situation. That sucks.

I’m comparing apples to oranges here, but if a girl beat me I’d shrug it off and go “Damn! She’s strong!” and yeah, I do know some very strong women – one of them plays semi-professional football so she’s tough. But … that’s me. Back to you.

Your girlfriend is proud of her strength and she likes to flex her muscles, pun intended. But it comes at a cost, and that cost is you. Tell her that you find it embarrassing, demeaning and that you would not be subjecting her to the same treatment if the roles were reversed (at least, I hope you wouldn’t) and go from there. Or you could hit the gym yourself and give her a taste of her own medicine…better to go with the first option.

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“Jaw With John” – V-Day Sheds Light On Girlfriend

I took my girlfriend of two months out for Valentine’s Day. I picked her up, meeting her with chocolates in hand, and we went out. We had a good time and naturally I paid for the event, food and drinks. OK. I’m fine with that.

We returned to her place and chatted as we held each other, and I managed slip into the conversation that I didn’t receive a Valentine’s gift from her. She brushed it off with some words and a smile. I drove home with pursed lips.

Isn’t Valentine’s Day supposed to be a two-way street? How should I handle this? — Jilted

Dear Jilted:

I once “dated” a girl for a month (about a date per week, with texting/messaging throughout the week) only to be told on the 4th, and final, date that she didn’t like me “that way.” She was happy to go out with me, have me buy food, movie tickets, go mini golfing etc. but didn’t want anything more. Needless to say it was a long train ride back home when she told me that.

It was also on that train that I decided to end things with her.

This is your train ride.

You need to think back over the last two months and wonder if she’s really meant for you. You know what? I’ll stop you right there. She’s not for you. It’s time to move on. Her not reciprocating Valentine’s Day, not even a card, draws a red flag. Her trying to talk her way out of it sends out flares. Bye Felicia.

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