Tag Archives: college

“Jaw With John” – College Student To Be Needs A Wake Up Call

My son “Jake” is headed to college in the fall, and I want his last year at home to be memorable and happy. He’s a good student and has been admitted to the college of his choice. The problem is, he can’t wake himself up in the morning. He switches off the alarm and goes back to sleep. I must go up to his room several times to wake him because he won’t get up the first time.

Jake is otherwise independent. He does his own laundry and keeps his room spotless. I’m spending a large part of my savings on his tuition, and I’m worried that unless he can wake himself in the mornings, he won’t get to classes on time.

I have tried talking to him about putting the alarm on “snooze” instead of turning it off, but nothing works. My husband suggests we pour a glass of cold water on Jake’s face 10 minutes after the alarm goes off. Can you help us solve this problem? — UP ALREADY IN NEW JERSEY

Dear Up,

You need to hit the snooze yourself.

He needs to learn to get up on his own. I assume that at this point he drives himself, or is in a carpool, for school, so, if he continually wakes up late and gets to school late then that’s on him. He’ll learn VERY quickly to get up with his alarm. Which will then prepare him for college life and being accountable.

You need to tell him that there isn’t going to be a “wake up call” if he ignores his alarm once he’s away at school anymore. You also need to tell him that this is a huge financial undertaking for you and your husband and he needs to take it seriously.

Listen, in college he might not have any early morning classes. He could very well choose courses that only happen in the late morning/early afternoon. It’s entirely possible that he could still turn off his alarm but still get to class on time. But, that’s probably not going to happen. Everyone has at least one 8am class during their four years. He needs to understand the implications if he does snooze through class.

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“Jaw With John” – Call Him, Maybe?

My boyfriend and I are leaving soon to go to different colleges. Our universities are three hours away from each other.

The thing is — I am scared!

I trust him, but he cannot communicate well. I know it sounds childish but when he takes a really long time to answer texts, I worry about how a long-distance relationship will work.

Sometimes he takes hours to text me back, unless I end my text with a question mark.

I love him and he loves me. We have talked about our future and I can see having a future with him, but what should I do?

I do not want to be upset and I do not want to break up, but if he never listens to how serious I am when it comes to communication, do you think I should move on?

Please help me. — College Girl

Dear College Girl:

Here’s a novel idea: CALL HIM!! I know it’s generally frowned upon by today’s youth, but that’s what those machines were originally built for … if you didn’t know.

Or, since you already know how to get a response from him, you could just end every single text with a question mark. Thus prompting him to respond. But he doesn’t seem that dumb to need a question mark to respond quickly since he’s bound to have responded to other messages without that punctuation. Or is he…?

In any event, long-distance relationships rarely work out – especially when it comes to college. Even though you are a mere three hours away it will feel like a lifetime. If it’s this hard to get him to respond when you are still in the same zip code, then imagine that compounded with the challenges of college and whatever else life brings. Instead of hours, you could be waiting days for a response. And that’s no bueno.

I’m not telling you to break things off with him over a few delayed text responses, but, college is tough enough without having to worry about a boy who doesn’t respond in a timely manner. So, like I said: CALL HIM! And if that doesn’t work, give him a taste of his own medicine and delay responding to him, but make sure you turn off the “read receipt” before you do.

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“Jaw With John” – You’ve Never Peed In The Sink?

I walked into the bathroom at 5 a.m. today to find my husband standing in the dark, urinating into the bathroom sink. He said he was “in a hurry.” The toilet was right behind him. He acts like it’s no big deal.

I’ve dropped my pills in the sink and retrieved them; I wash my face in there, etc. Now I don’t even want to use the sink. What can I say to him or what can I do to make him stop? — Revolted

Dear Revolted:

This isn’t a big deal. Trust me.

When I was in college I would often pee in my sink because I didn’t want to walk to the bathroom and deal with the bright hallway lights that would wake me up. I would run the water, pee and then coat the sink with dish soap and then with some Clorox or something similar to cleanse it some more. But never while my roommate was around, because that would be weird.

You do realize that people pee in showers right? Thus, your feet (and maybe your entire body if it’s a tub/shower combo) are, possibly, in some amount of pee…and other bodily fluids too…just saying.

Listen, it’s not something that I would do regularly or actively condone but sometimes it happens. I would only do it if I was in dire straits, super tired or drunk and but I think you only need to worry about it if you catch him doing it regularly. Otherwise, break out the bleach and clean until you feel better. Or have him catch you peeing in the sink and see what happens. He might be impressed.

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“Jaw With John” – He Wouldn’t Walk 1000 Miles To Fall Down At Your Door

I am an 18-year-old girl. I have been dating my boyfriend for nearly two years.

My boyfriend means everything to me. Although I have made mistakes we would talk and fix things, and everything would be OK.

Last year we both went to university in different parts of the country, so it was like we were having a long-distance relationship. I was OK with it until I met another guy who gave me everything I have been missing. We were not really dating but I had sex with him many times.

Earlier this week my boyfriend found out and broke up with me. It was only after he was gone that I realized he has always been and always will be my everything. I still love him.

I want him back, but he doesn’t want to hear from me. — M

Dear M:

You “[had] been dating your boyfriend for nearly two years.” He “[meant] everything to” you. You keep addressing things in the present tense when it’s clearly the past. You cheated, he found out, he broke up with you, and now he wants nothing to do with you. I don’t blame him. He clearly has ZERO interest in getting back together with you and you’ve only now realized what he meant to you AFTER you cheated on him and he left you.

You can’t have your cake and eat it too.

You should’ve either chosen to be with him or not when you went off to school. Long-distance relationships rarely, if ever, work out. I had a public speaking professor who was vehemently against long-distance relationships – so much so that he presented his argument in a lecture/public speaking example – and it’s stuck with me since. Here’s the good news: you’re 18. You have learned a valuable lesson in life, love, and dating. Maybe this will teach you how to act in your next relationship. Or maybe it won’t. It’s up to you.

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“Jaw With John” – Needy Nephew Needs Nothing

Our nephew is graduating soon and he has sent family members letters asking for money for a trip he would like to take. His father is a multimillionaire and can more than afford to fund the trip.

I find it very rude. Is our nephew wrong for begging from family?

There have been no discussions whatsoever about gifts — he just slammed the family with this request.

My brother should be ashamed of himself for allowing his son to do this. It would be a little different if he had said, “If anyone is wondering what I might like …” (or something to that effect), instead of just assuming everyone was planning to give him something.

He just said he wanted to go on a trip and asked if we could help. — Frustrated at Brother

Dear Frustrated:

It’s February, how is he “graduating soon”? Most schools graduate in May or June. Also, is he of High School age or College age? Because if he’s trying to bridge the gap between High School and College then he should just be like everyone else and get a Summer job instead of, presumably, wanting to backpack across Europe. If he’s graduating from College then perhaps he has earned a bit of a vacation but he was most definitely wrong for asking for money for a trip outright.

There is no reason to be openly mad at your brother because he has not attached his name to this request. Since you feel strongly about this, tell your nephew “No”. It can be a valuable lesson for him in the future about how to approach asking for things. Or he’ll just run to Daddy Warbucks and get the money from him.

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