Tag Archives: Aunt

“Jaw With John” – Mani, Pedi, Angry Auntie

Recently I received a photo from my niece, who works in a high-powered job. Her daughter is almost three years old.

Although I love this child, I was very upset when I saw her getting a pedicure.

A few weeks later, my sister (the child’s grandmother) sent another photo of this child … this time getting a manicure. My sister thought it was cute!

I am far from amused. In fact I am disgusted. I am a generous auntie with no children but I will not pay for frivolity with my hard-earned money.

While I am able to be lavish, birthdays are coming for this child and her twin brother, but I have no intention of sending anything and will spend my money on those in need.

Is this behavior the norm? I would love your feedback. — Disgusted Auntie

Dear Disgusted:

You make it sound like you’re the one paying for all of this. I don’t believe that you are so all you can do is scowl from a far. It also sounds like your niece is well enough off that she can afford to do these things with and for her children and that’s her decision. You’re not paying for it, even though you seem to think you are because you send “lavish” gifts and money.

Threatening to hold back and not buy these young children (toddlers really) gifts comes off as petty and it’s something that they have no control over. You’d be punishing them for something their mother did and is that the kind of auntie you want to be?

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“Jaw With John” – Marilynsanity

My uncle’s wife, “Marilyn,” is very difficult. She invites herself to other peoples’ Facebook accounts, tells humiliating stories about others and keeps tabs on other people’s private information.

She has been passive-aggressively taunting me for being single after my very difficult breakup with a girlfriend. I have not been in a stable relationship since my breakup, but both of my younger brothers have significant others, and Marilyn throws this in my face. She has also done this to those who have lost spouses and are still grieving, upsetting them deeply.

Marilyn even invited my ex-girlfriend to a private family gathering where she didn’t belong. My ex attended and was provocatively dressed (I feel just to embarrass me), and was revealing her reputation for shameless promiscuity.

My uncle can’t control Marilyn’s behavior. This type of harassment even got her slapped with a no-contact order by a family member, which she was clearly asking for.

How do I make it clear that I do not appreciate this type of humiliation and disrespect without resorting to such legal restraint? — Alienated Nephew

Dear Nephew:

Your Aunt sounds like a bitch. A bitch who wants nothing more than to stir up controversy and see how others react with no regards to their feelings. AKA a psychopath.

When I think of your aunt I’m reminded of what Alfred said when he was describing The Joker in The Dark Knight: “Because some [wo]men aren’t looking for anything logical, like money. They can’t be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some [wo]men just want to watch the world burn.”

When it comes to Facebook you can block, unfollow, or simply unfriend your aunt so she can’t see what you’re up to anymore and limit who can see your information, posts, etc. It is also possible to delete her posts. If you want to be passive aggressive right back to her you could do that. You seem averse to talking to her directly. So, beyond telling your aunt freeze bitch, there’s not much else you can do here.

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“Jaw With John” – Aunt Is A Regular Sue Storm

In yesterday’s mail we received a birth announcement of a new great-nephew, addressed only to my husband.

Christmas cards, wedding announcements, birth announcements, thank-you cards — anything coming from his sister and her children all are addressed only to him.

The most mention I ever get is “and Family.” One wedding invitation actually came to “Uncle John and Family.” Our children are grown so presumably I’m the nameless “Family.”

I buy the presents and sign the cards and checks. There’s no animosity between us. I’ve known the kids since birth and they are all nice people. But each omission makes me feel, well, a bit unwanted.

I’m tempted to have only my husband sign the card that I bought before the announcement arrived. I want him to tell his sister that this makes me feel sad and left out. He doesn’t see it as an issue and thinks I should ignore it, but he also says that since it bothers me, I should tell her myself.

What’s your take? — The Invisible Aunt

Dear Invisible:

Listen to your husband here and talk directly to his sister. I know what it’s like to be slighted, albeit in a different manner.

It was Christmas, the family was opening presents and we had decided to open gifts from a certain friend all at the same time. All the gifts were neatly and elegantly wrapped and there was a note saying that the gifts were all from a recent trip to Africa … except for me. I got a calendar. I looked around and said, to myself, There was nothing in Africa that could be for me? Not one thing? I moved on and now it’s a pretty decent joke I can tell. Your situation is different but similar.

You know you need to bring this to the attention of your brother’s sister otherwise it will continue. Being passive aggressive with the notes and gifts won’t solve anything. Ask your sister-in-law “What’s up?” because unlike my calendar, your feelings won’t go away after January 1st.

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“Jaw With John” – Needy Nephew Needs Nothing

Our nephew is graduating soon and he has sent family members letters asking for money for a trip he would like to take. His father is a multimillionaire and can more than afford to fund the trip.

I find it very rude. Is our nephew wrong for begging from family?

There have been no discussions whatsoever about gifts — he just slammed the family with this request.

My brother should be ashamed of himself for allowing his son to do this. It would be a little different if he had said, “If anyone is wondering what I might like …” (or something to that effect), instead of just assuming everyone was planning to give him something.

He just said he wanted to go on a trip and asked if we could help. — Frustrated at Brother

Dear Frustrated:

It’s February, how is he “graduating soon”? Most schools graduate in May or June. Also, is he of High School age or College age? Because if he’s trying to bridge the gap between High School and College then he should just be like everyone else and get a Summer job instead of, presumably, wanting to backpack across Europe. If he’s graduating from College then perhaps he has earned a bit of a vacation but he was most definitely wrong for asking for money for a trip outright.

There is no reason to be openly mad at your brother because he has not attached his name to this request. Since you feel strongly about this, tell your nephew “No”. It can be a valuable lesson for him in the future about how to approach asking for things. Or he’ll just run to Daddy Warbucks and get the money from him.

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“Jaw With John” – Lemme Paint You An Easy Picture

My aunt and uncle died about 10 years ago; they were both well into their 90s. Because they had no children, I inherited their things — including a very large painting which was a gift from my aunt’s much-younger cousin (he has now passed away).

The painting is of my aunt and uncle, taken from their 50th anniversary photo. It’s a very nice rendition, but I’m not sure what to do with it. There are no other relatives I could offer it to, and I don’t really have room for it. I hate to just trash it; I feel that would be disrespectful to their memory. Do you have any suggestions? — Concerned Niece

Dear Concerned:

Put it in storage. Done.

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