Dear John: You Can Find Boyfriend In Da Strip Club

My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and a half. We are planning on moving to California together in a few months.

I flew to Monterey to job hunt, and he is supposed to be flying in soon. However, last night I found out he and his buddy went to a strip club. My boyfriend knows I’m uncomfortable with him going to strip clubs, and he assured me that they would not be going when we spoke on the phone earlier in the evening.

He says I’m controlling and childish for being angry at him. I told him it’s either me or the strip clubs — mostly just to see how he would react. His response was that freedom of choice is very important to him. I even went as far as to say if he feels the need to go to strip clubs, then I would start stripping on the side to spite him.

I’m tempted to cancel his ticket to California. I don’t want him flying here if we are just going to fight. Is this situation worth the cost of a relationship? How do I deal with someone so stubborn to the point he can’t see when he’s in the wrong? He is in the wrong, isn’t he? — CHOICE IS CLEAR

 

Dear Choice,

Does he visit strip clubs often? Because if he did, then I could see how that would be a problem. If he doesn’t but he still just continues to go (and you’re SUPER pissed about it) even when you’ve broadcasted your feelings about going, then it might be time to hitch your wagon to a new horse.

If you guys don’t break up, let me know when and where I can watch you dance. But HEY! If you do go that route, you might be able to spend more time with your boyfriend. Win-Win.

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