“Jaw With John” – She’ll Get The Next One

I am a high school teacher in my mid-20s. I am saving to move out of my parents’ home and go to graduate school. Needless to say, every penny counts.

Recently I have noticed a trend with my friend every time we go out for dinner, grab a coffee, take a cab or simply any time money is involved. She has a mentality of “You get this one, I’ll get the next.” The problem is, sometimes there isn’t a “next,” or the “next” is forgotten and I end up holding the bag. This seems to happen the most with cab rides where I have cash and she doesn’t. Then, if reminded, she shrugs it off with, “Yup, I owe you one.”

I can barely afford to pay my own way. I love my friend dearly but do not know how to approach this. Will I risk insulting her? — Unwilling Warbucks

Dear Warbucks:

You tell her straight up “No, you’re gonna pay your share” or “You’re gonna get this one since you owe me more than one.” Either that or forget your wallet altogether so that she’ll have to pay. Also! Doesn’t she know that cabs now accept credit cards…she’s just making excuses and you know what excuses are? Excuses are like butt-holes: everyone has one and they alllllll stink.

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