“Jaw With John” – Return To Sender

Over time I have received repeated invitations for dinner, a play, a special event, etc., from acquaintances whose company and activities I don’t enjoy. If I meet them on the street or in the neighborhood, a few minutes of pleasant conversation is fine. Otherwise I find them boring, high-pressure and totally involved in things I don’t care about or want to spend my time on.

If I accept invitations I feel an obligation to reciprocate, which is annoying.

I don’t enjoy their interests (opera, travel, expensive trips, constant socializing and their high-octane chatter) or company, so is it reasonable just to say, “That’s not something I really enjoy and need to pass up at this time. But thank you for thinking of me”?

It seems harsh but I am tired of making lame excuses that serve no purpose long term. — Dreading Those Invitations

Dear Dreading:

You don’t enjoy travel?

You don’t enjoy travel.

A part of me finds this mind boggling. Another part finds it refreshing. EVERY SINGLE WOMAN I would see on dating sites would list how much they loooooooove to travel and I would say (in my head) “Oh really? You like to get away from your home and go someplace new and exciting? That makes you special and interesting….” NO IT DOESN’T!!! IT MAKES YOU LIKE EVERYONE ELSE!! Gah! But that’s another story for another time.

Your choice is simple: politely decline their invitations and say you’re not interested. That will stop them from badgering you and it could lead to them presenting you with different events to go to that you might enjoy.

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