“Jaw With John” – Auntie’s Offspring Have Been Busy

At 88 years of age, I am the last remaining child of a family of nine children. My health is fair, and my income is sufficient.

My problem is that I have 35 nieces and nephews (all in another state) who are starting to marry. They are kindly extending invitations to me. I have sent a financial gift to four weddings, but if I continue at this pace I’ll be broke.

How do I stop this “graciously”? They do love their aunt. — Auntie Em, The Great

Dear Auntie:

35!? Daaaaaaaayummmmm, your family knows how to procreate. I’d suggest finding the cheapest thing on their registry and buying that OR just giving them a memento from your family. And if they just want money tell them that the way that you’re gifting money that you’ll have to move in with them at some point. That will give them a good scare and let them know that you can’t give them money anymore.

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