“Jaw With John” – Covering Up Private Parts

I frequently read in your column about people snooping into their partner’s e-mail or texts and how that is a breach of privacy. I disagree.
No part of either my phone or computer is private from my husband.

He is too lazy to log out of my Facebook account and into his, so he just reads mine (he never comments for me, though). If I wanted to hide any portion of my personal life from him, I think it would mean that I was doing or thinking something that I shouldn’t. If we live authentic, honest lives, there is nothing to hide. Our privacy should be shared privacy.

Please explain what is wrong with my thinking. — Confused Reader

Dear Confused:
What’s wrong with your thinking? Look at your verbiage there. You use the word “snooping” which already implies that you’re going through things you shouldn’t.

As for your husband, I agree with you that he is just too lazy to log out of Facebook OR he just doesn’t remember his password and continues to use your account. I’m gonna go with forgotten password here.

It bothers me that you believe that even thinking something you shouldn’t is wrong. Are you one of those guys from Scanners where if you think about exploding someone’s head you will? Oh, you’re not? Well then, that just sounds ridiculous.

You also say that “if we live authentic, honest lives, there is nothing to hide.” Well, let me tell you something Rocky Balboa told his son in Rocky Balboa: “The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows.” There is always something to hide. Whether or not you choose to share that is entirely up to you.

Privacy is not about “hiding” things from other people, it’s about keeping things to yourself because they are personal or, stay with me here, private. Respect that others feel this way and stay away from my phone … and computer … and my craigslist account. Better yet, just stay away from me entirely.

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